Losing Grip - Avril Lavigne

Losing Grip
Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you
Why'd you turn away?
Here's what I have to say I was left to cry there,
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided

[chorus]
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
You, you need to listen I'm starting to trip,
I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone

Am I just some chick you place beside you to take somebody's place
when you turn around can you recognize my face you used to love me,
you used to hug me
But that wasn't the case
Everything wasn't ok I was left to cry there
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided

[chorus]

Crying out loud I'm crying out loud
Crying out loud I'm crying out loud

Open your eyes
Open up wide
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there
when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care
If you don't care then I don't care were not going newhere
Why should I care cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care If you don't care then i don't care were not going newhere

thoughts... & also a msg to my sis...

~tell me wat is tis guy thinkin..~
u may think his sad, or maybe even jus day dreamin..
but u will never kno how tis person feels exactly if u dun ask and he doesnt say it out
jus like me...
today wanted to go for gb but den i didnt
i dun wanna go gb... i always feel left out
i dun like gb... and i never liked it before!
i really dun understand why i joined gb in sec 1...
well...
its because my sis say join uniformed grp hao...
and wanted me to join a uniformed grp...
but... i didnt thought of it... am i really suitable to be in a uniformed grp?
well.. i can say.. the answer is no.
i wanted to join sports... i dun like the uniformed grp thingy.. never liked it before.
not in the past,
not in present,
and i think...
not in future too...
why didnt i jus join badmintion in sec 1?
well.. i was in badminton in pri sch.. and i like it...
i dun have to be always in grps and can be able to live alone in sports cca...
how stupid of me!
for once... i regreted listenin to my sis.
but wat can i do now?
tis stupid horrible freakin cca sytem in sec sch is so!
i have to stick wif tis horrible cca tt i never liked for my whole entire sec sch life!!!
i dun have any real good friends in gb...
even if i have mag in there... she's not always there...
im still usually alone...
wat a idiot horrible stupid silly choice of me chosin gb as my cca!!!
HATE IT !!!!!

sad endin for sch

~its rainin today...~
today is the last day of sch...
got assembly... and... its quite sad lor....
*i almost cried...*
many teachers, great teachers and leavin us... includin mr lim and mr goh....
they cried... i will never forget the... the look on mr lim's face...
so sad...
jus wander how kcp will be like after them leavin us...
one word -- bad
veri sad... its quite a long story so i wont say much abt it...
after sch wanted to go watch bball team play bball... but den... cannot...
firstly, have to go home and wait for daddy's call
secondly, i dun wanna get bite again like yesterday...
thirdly, its like goin to rain...
so i got my bio book and went home...
not after long... it rained...
well... its a day i like although its kinda sad, the rain make me happy again...
well... u may kno why i like rain... and u may not... i think only around 2 or 3 ppl kno why i like rain ba....
*or maybe even less dan tt*
oh well...

hope tt the results tonite for singapore idol is not disappointin...

totally shocked!

~totally... hmm... dun kno how to say~
today is the moment we all have been waitin for!!!
*but den also the moment tt some may not wan it to come..*
the day where our report books will be given out!!!
*d-i-e*
well.. tts wat i tot before i got back my report book lah...
i was like prayin tt i will get back my report book....
after a few names have been called out... i heard...
TRIXY MOK!
hahaha!!!!! my name! my name!
MY NAME HAD BEEN CALLED OUT!!!!
hahaha.... im goin to sec 4 joy!!! hahaha!!!!
not only tt man...
opened my report book... guess wat?
class position: 10/39
haha!!! i tot i will be the last 10 lor... top 10 frm the back and totally not the front!!
but..hahaha!!!!
wait! theres more!!
level position: 87/XXX (forgot wat XXX is liao...)
haha!!!!first time lehz!!!! first time my level position is less dan 100 one!!! haha...
i saw tt my results are almost the same as in the semester 1, but den i can still be so high positioned.. haha... TOTALLY UNBELIEVABLE!!!
haha.. called to tell my dad...he say he will treat me movie for my class position.. hahaha!!!!
COOL!!!

later on...

went to bought my novel after sch den went to double ring and watch da, ed and ct play bball..
wanted to play one.. but den sooooo many ppl... didnt get to play....
there ar.. got alot of stupid mosquito bittin me... now i got both the back of my legs bitten like mad... super itchy man... look so horribly horrible too...
when i left double ring there, said bye to 52 den walk off... den a distance away liao den ct and 40 say byebye to me... heehee...
*40 said byebye to mua!*
when i was abt to go up the bus, ct and da came runnin to me say wan me to 'liu xia' $2 before i leave... but den i only have a $5 and i have the use it later...
pai seh!!!

~smile~
today... finally back to sch!
got tis groomin course thingy...
learnt stuff like how to sit properly... how to get into a car etc...
veri funny thing abt it is tt we got to see everyone doin 'catwalk'...
*hahaha...*
those guy ar... super funny man... mostly all act cool one.. haha... den tt alvin ar.. haha... give tt stupid look..! haha
ok lah... quite cool overall...
hmm... not bad... at least i learnt something!

~ erm......hair....~
today ar... hmm.. nth much actually... stay home all day... play com watch tv.....
only tt ar.. last nite my sis and i were lookin for some retro stuff den we started to play wif some small hair pins(clips) *dun kno wat to call it*. it's veri veri small....
i put all of them on my sis's hair... den she was sayin.. ' when raymond come out on his hair'...
den today.. raymond come... den my sis really put them on his hair!
*but half only lah...*
den they were goin out... my sis wan raymond go out wif all those pins on his hair...
do u think he will go out like tt?
my answer to tt is.... no?
well... he did stepped out of my house one step wif all those thingy on his hair....
den my neighbour's my girl said, hen piao liang'(veri pretty).. haha..
den my sis fang guo raymond... took everything out... haha....
haiz... too bad i dun have the pic.. haiz...

~oh!~
today got post exam... got a carnival thingy... didnt get to watch bball match... :'( cos got duty...
*cry...*
today ar... when i jus open my wallet... i tot have $6 pocket money... who knos?! i only have $2!!! i cant even get something to eat on the carnival...!
there goes.... my fried ice cream!!!!!
*sad...*
den my dad brought me home.. he say my shoe laces so funny... ask me, ' u got no money to buy shoe laces izzit?'
haha... den my dad wan a daily 'report' on watever i do from 1 nov.
*er....*

at night...


singapore idol!!!
hahaha...
quite disappointed...
maia is out! christopher still in...
can die ar...
jus hope tt he will go out next week le lha..
let the talents stay....

~Keep Out! (Im still sleeping!)~
today didnt go to sch... haha.. slack!
now while im bloggin many ppl still in sch rottin man....
hmm... although go sch is slack... do nth much... but den today have art lehz... my flower pot havent paint finish... :(
tml post exam act liao... yeah...! no need to rot... hahaha.....
hmm... nth much to blog now... maybe will blog again later at nite...

*rainin*

~totally upsetting, sad day...~
got gb thingy today... so cannot go Kbox as planned weeks ago...
go to sch... cried for 2 times....
do the pebbles thingy... super bue da han...
its jus like those sec 1 gg girls too...
wanna do things they like... if cannot sell out those pebbles how?
*they dont seem to think abt if lor...*
come back from sch... went to cut hair...
again... the shop owner change liao...
*totally regret goin to cut my hair...*
should have jus stayed home and watch tv... e ep i missed last night!!!
*sick!*
when there... got tis lady... the first eye i see her hor... have tis bad feelin tt my hair will be cut until dun kno like wat...
she doesnt seem to have any confidence in watever she's doin!
cut my hair cut until so nerd man...
the back SO strenght... fringe cut wrongly... i wan a ^ shape... she go and cut a / shape...
super short... super er xin!
there goes....
well... at least my fringe gro fast lah...
*jus confortin myself...*
den almost cried the 3rd time today.... :'(

*rainin*

19 Oct jin's birthday

~wat a day man...~
today is jin's birthday...
many crazae stuff happened...
jie first time wear skirt... haha....
jin bought a super girl skirt...
me? jus tt normal skirt and me! ;P
ganna followed by 2 sch boys after changin our super long shoe laces...
*haha.. dun kno how to tie man....*
went to orchard after tt.... eat burger king...
again... jus when i went to buy food... someone spilled his drink... again... its coke and a few drops spilled on my left ankle there...
went to watch 'The Cool Guy' ... the show... i tot not veri nice.. but who knos? cant judge a book by its cover rite? its a pretty nice show after all... hehehe....
den went to heeren take neo....
guess who we saw? LESTER ONG JING HAO!!!!
tt blind guy... all he knos is to hold a girl's hand... we 3 there he also dun kno....
*jian zhi shi xia le yan ar!*
den we walk walk.... den walk to PS...
scared tt we will see soccer team...
*as for me... i think we will see sherman....*
good thing... nth happened much!
saw sherleen... NOT sherman... *hurray!!!*
den go home loh.... hmm....

so sad lehz... tml cannot go Kbox.....

I WANNA GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

heard tt dun kno why eve have the idea tt i DUN WAN to go tml....

but...

but...

it's CANNOT.... NOT DUN WAN!!!!

*sad....*

who!?!?!?!?! who say one!!!!????

*.... angry....*

*rainin*

~shaking!!!~
today did parade commanding in the mornin... super ke pa lor....
still prefer singin on stage dan do commandin...
but den...
...durin chapel... heehee.. i was shakin when doin back up... haha....
first time paryin infront of other people...
*shake shake... shake shake...*

*rainin*

~hmm... hmm..~
~yum... yum...~
today raymond bought some (or shuld i say alot) of food cooked by his dad...
wat can i say besides....... TOTALLY TASTY!!!
heehee... haha... hao hao chi oh....
totally love the curry man....

*rainin*

AT LAST!!!!! JERRY'S OUT!!!
after soooooooo long, he's finally out!!! SO HAPPY!!!

Singapore!!!! U Rox!!!!

*Rann*

wat is call useful thing?
today got bball interhouse... my mom demand me to stay home and do 'useful' thing...
woke up quite early.... make my own breakfast... ans guess wat?!
I Nearly Burn Down The House!!!
*haha... funny rite?*
well.... is tt call a useful thing?
why it happened? ...er... its a long story...
and now my house still smell or smoke!
*cough cough...*

i'm dying....

*RaInIn*

No Fair!!!
Singapore!!! wat R U doin!!!???
hai yo.... singapore ar.... wat u doin man...
watched sg idol today... (e results...)
super unhappy wif the results man....
Jerry carry on his journey in sg idol...
Christ still carry on after his horrible performes....
Lastly... most horribily.... DAVID YEO GANNA KICKED OUT!!!!!!!
SINGAPORE!!!! VOTE FOR TALENT LAH!!!! NOT LOOKS!!!!!
*kill me.....*

*Rann*

WHEN I LOOK INTO YOUR EYES - Firehouse

I see forever when I look in your eyes
You're all I ever wanted
I always want you to be mine
Let's make a promise till the end of time
We'll always be together
And our love will never die

So here we are face to face
And heart to heart
I want you to know we will
Never be apart
Now I believe that wishes can come true
Cause I see my whole world
I see only you

Chorus:
When I look into your eyes
I can see how much I love you
And it makes me realize
When I look into your eyes
I see all my dreams come true
When I look into your eyes

I've looked for you all of my life
Now that I've found you
We will never say goodbye
I can't stop this feeling
There's nothing I can do
'Cause I see everything when I look at you

Open Arms

Lying beside you, here in the dark
Feeling your heart beat with mine
Softly you whisper, you're so sincere
How could our love be so blind
We sailed on together
We drifted apart
And here you are by my side

Chorus:
So now I come to you, with open arms
Nothing to hide, believe what I say
So here I am with open arms
Hoping you'll see what your love means to me
Open arms

Living without you, living alone
This empty house seems so cold
Wanting to hold you, wanting you near
How much I wanted you home
But now that you've come back
Turned night into dayI need you to stay.

(chorus)